Sometimes we get so caught up in what we want more of in life, that we forget to reflect on what we need less of.
What we don’t realize is that to truly grow and receive those things we want, we need to make room for them by letting go of things that no longer serve us. There are certain mindsets that clutter our mind and hold us back from living life to our potential.
“When you let go, you create space for better things to enter your life.” – Unknown
When you let go of the past and thoughts that bring you down, you create space for acceptance, learning, and growth.
As much of a self-development junkie as I am, I still struggle to conquer thoughts that hold me back. I won’t always have the right answer, decision, or reaction – but by simply trying I’m already taking the steps to making room for better things in my life.
Today I’m sharing with you 5 mindsets that we need to let go of to make room for growth and better things to come.
Things We Need to Let Go of in Order to Grow
1. Fear of getting out of our comfort zone
Who else loves their cozy, little comfort zone? Right there with ya.
As humans, we crave comfort. It’s our little bubble where we can relax without stress or unexpected circumstances.
There’s nothing wrong with being in your comfort zone – until it starts holding you back from challenging yourself and trying things that make you uncomfortable. We tend to run from things that will help us grow without even realizing it.
“Always go with the choice that scares you the most because that’s the one that’s going to help you grow.” – Caroline Myss
As much as I love my comfort zone, I realized that it was holding me back from becoming the best version of myself. So this year, I decided to make one of my intentions to feel the fear and do that thing anyway.
Next time you’re faced with a decision, try to think about what your 90-year-old self would do. Would they stay in their comfort zone and let the fear paralyze them and or would they take the risk that can bring 100 new opportunities to them?
2. Resentments from the past
Growing up I always held my resentments and negative feelings in. I found it easier to shut down than to confront people about what I felt.
What I’ve learned is that holding onto past grudges only hurts you, not them. Dwelling on the past doesn’t allow us to move forward and make space for bigger and better feelings.
“Resentments are like swallowing poison and expecting the other people to die.” – Nelson Mandela
When you keep repeating those resentments over and over in your head, you’re exposing yourself to those negative feelings all over again.
The best thing to do so you can move on is to forgive people for hurting you – not for them but for you. The grudge that you carry is only affecting you. Don’t give them that power over you. Learn to let go to give yourself that closure.Let go of these 5 things to make room for growth in your life Click To Tweet
3. Negativity that consumes you
As humans, we can’t completely avoid feeling negative emotions. But we do have control over our thoughts, what we tune into, and how much we let them affect us.
Step one in getting control of negative thoughts is to practice positive self-talk. I wrote a whole blog post on how to do that here.
- Read this next: How to Practice Positive Self-Talk to Feel Happy and Confident
When you practice positive self-talk, you become aware of your thoughts and put a positive spin on what you feel. Complaints turn to gratitude, criticism turns to praise and self-doubt turns to confidence.
Positive self-talk is a HUGE player in how happy, confident and motivated you feel towards life.
You can also be selective of what you tune into. For example, if you’re constantly watching or listening to horror stories or fear-based news you tend to unintentionally reflect those emotions in your reality.
Choose to surround yourself with positivity so you can move through and conquer the negative thoughts when they arrive.
4. Feeling guilt or shame
As much as we need to forgive others for their wrongdoings, we also need to forgive ourselves. Carrying regret around hurts your self-esteem and confidence
We all have things that we regret, things that we don’t like talking about, and things that make us want to turn back the clock to get a do-over.
But we have to remember that we’re so much more than our imperfections.
The truth is that we all mess up. There is no sense in beating yourself up for the past. Take the steps necessary for you to forgive yourself. Turn inwards and understand why you feel guilty.
Write it out or talk it out to gain a new perspective, accept it for what it is, and find that compassion for yourself. If it involves another person, make amends if you have to.
Start seeing the relationship with yourself as the most important relationship in your life and take that experience as a valuable lesson moving forward.
5. Thinking making time for yourself is selfish
Being busy is unavoidable sometimes. But you shouldn’t wear busy as a badge of honor. When you think you’re too busy to rest, you tend to neglect yourself and often feel even more stressed and overwhelmed.
Whether it’s not getting enough sleep, declining social invitations, or working 12-hour days, being too busy, all the time, is a sign that your life is out of balance.
That’s why self-care is not selfish, it’s absolutely necessary.
“An empty lantern provides no light. Self-care is the fuel that allows your light to shine brightly.” – Unknown
Make time for not only rest but things that light you up. Life isn’t made to work, work, work and pay bills. It’s made to be enjoyed. Create a life that excites you by doing things you love instead of constantly gasping for air in the midst of how busy you are.
You have to take care of yourself first so that you can give your best to the world.
Read this next: 12 Simple Self-Care Tips and Ideas for a Healthy Life
6. Comparing yourself to others
Thanks to social media, these days it’s so common for us to compare our reality to other people’s highlight reels. We tend to forget that what we’re seeing is only scratching the surface of what people choose to put out there. We have no idea what their reality really looks like.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” – Theodore Roosevelt
A few ways to shift your mindset away from comparison:
- Make a list of all the things you have accomplished in life, big or small.
- Make note of the discomfort you feel when you compare yourself to others. Recognize that feeling and then make a choice to let it go and choose positive thoughts.
- If somebody else has something you want, use it as inspiration to work towards that goal. Since somebody in your circle has it, get excited because it’s getting closer and closer to you.
Comparing our lives to other people’s lives distract us. When you make a conscious effort to stop wastime time comparing, you bring the focus back to yourself and give yourself time for learning and growing.
Letting go of mindsets that don’t help you grow is a journey. It will often be a choice you have to make daily – but every time you make that choice, you come back a little bit stronger.
Once you learn to recognize what you need to let go of in order to grow, you start to create space for the bigger and better things that life has in store for you.
Now over to you … what mindsets have you let go to help you grow? Let me know in the comments below!